How to break a bad cycle?

We have all seen a soccer game where two teams draw for the first 85 minutes. One team scores on a careless mistake and wins three to nothing in the last five minutes of the match. 

Or, you play a very fair game of chess, you make a mistake and lose your queen, in a rush, your next move is also wrong, and you lose your rook.

Why is this happening?
The first move brings a moment of confusion. We made a mistake.
Driven by the ego, the fear, the anger, our first reaction is to rush. Those emotions are rarely a good advisor, and they often transform a complex situation still manageable, into a chaotic situation.

How to break the cycle?

• Take a deep breath. If the situation allows it, close your eyes, take a few steps, put water on your face…do something that brings you back to the now.
  
• Recognize your mistake. Say to your inner voice that you are going to treat it later and learn from it. If feasible, take a quick note of the error on any support. It will free your mind, and you’ll gain clarity of what needs to be done now. Quit the “Why have I done that?” to the “How can I make the best of this situation?”
  
• Review all your options. In many situations, we have more than one option. Review them quickly. Your previous mistake has changed the context. You may need to adapt your plan.
  
• Think, but don’t overthink. Fear can paralyze you. It does not help to review the same thought over and over. Make your different iterations and take your next steps.

It’s not the first mistake that is the issue – we all make errors, it’s how we react to them which is the key. You can end the football game at 1-1 or even 2-1. You can win the chess game without your queen and your rook.
And that’s the same for many life situations. In a complex case, a moment of calm can save you from chaos.

Related articles.
How to develop the habit of believing in yourself.
Is it too late to start improving myself?
The one thing I do to transform my fear into energy.
Do you want to achieve more? Sleep better.
The Bad Child: How can self-reflection benefit you?